Every day I came across posts, ads and articles that tell me life is better when you’re slim. Which hairstyle makes your face look thinner, which dress makes you look one size smaller, which sexual position burns the most calories (because yes, that is obviously what really matters), which household chore will help you lose weight, which exercises will make your body smaller, which pose is more slimming, which guilty pleasure food you should feel least guilty about (ehm, what?), that taking a bath burns calories and that people who sleep more tend to weigh less. The list truly is endless.
It seems like everything we do in life, from how we wear our hair to what we do with our spare time, revolves around weightloss.
So it’s really no surprise that all of us seem collectively afraid of being fat. Being fat is probably one of the worst things a woman can be. Even as kids, when we want to insult another girl, we call her fat. In fact, if you generally want to insult a woman, you either call her fat or your call her a whore (as a feminist, I actually have a lot to say about the latter as well, but one thing at a time okay?).
You may not believe it, because you pretty much NEVER see those examples around you, but being fat doesn’t actually stop you from having an amazing life. Fat women have amazing lives all the time. Fat women can have great careers, excel at sports, have an amazing sexlife, shop awesome clothes, have a group of amazing friends and be amazing friends to others. Fat women date and have wonderful marriages, they travel, they go out and enjoy themselves. Fat women run marathons and lift weights and turns themselves into a pretzel at yogaclass. Fat women are capable of love and happiness and kindness and acceptance, just as much as anybody else.
Dear thin friends, when you say you’re afraid of being fat, you’re basically saying you’re afraid of looking like me. Like the worst thing in the world that could happen to you, is being someone like me. And I am telling you right now: there are worse things in life than that.
photography by Bart Peeters